Tidbits

I was filing birth homework and decided to read some of B's questions.  One of them caught me off guard and I almost pee'd my pants.
Q: What are your fears about birth?
B: I'm afraid she will rush the birth and not be patient! 


Reverting back to a previous post about being a great parent and pet owner until you actually have to do it, Well I'm here to say I suck already.

People often question B and I when we say "one and done".  They tell us we don't even know what its like to be parents and the joy of having children.  In my opinion the homeless dude is saying that about his crack, "just try it, you don't even know how good it is".

So we have 1 dog and 1 cat, making it 2 against 2.  As the humans we have no control. We are on an even playing field with the furry critters and they know it!

Exhibit 1- ace goes into our bedroom when we leave, coon gets the run of the house.  Sometimes coon lets ace out just to spite us. So saturday night coon waited patiently outside of our room until we left to let ace out. ( I told B as we were leaving that ace would be free when we came home. Sure as shit that cat let his brother out)

They tag team us already. If one starts misbehaving then the other one starts in.  The fight over food, toys, attention ect.  There is no way in hell we are having two kids! The one already rules this house and he is still in my womb!

Today I have another prenatal appointment. They will say, "wow your still small", " still no weight gain", " your measuring small again". Since I know all the answers, I just want to skip it.  More than reassuring these appointments are boring and redundant.

B has returned in parrot form, lucky me.......
---- have you made your birth playlist? (asked 50+ times this weekend)
----have you written the birth plan? ( asked 50+ times)
----- how are you planning on relaxing
---- where did your belly button go? ( could have punched him for this one)

My favorite comment from this weekend is-B " I can't wait until this pregnancy is over, it has been really hard"

My reply " what has been so hard for you? Are you the one who is pregnant? Long pause with no response..... my point exactly!

Sunny Side Up

Only my son would start being stubborn and in control already.  He must be following suit from his brothers who don't give a rats ass about my rules or expectations of them.

Prime example right here! And he just started drinking my coffee!

Anyways, Bean has been quite the prankster.  From hiding well in my womb to kicking the cat through my belly and now continuing to stay sunny side up He is really giving me a run for my money.  Two weeks ago he was still quite comfy in the transverse position.  Thanks to the chiropractor we got him back to head down. Now he needs to turn around! 

Apparently posture has a lot to do with babies position, go figure.  Basically that means no more recliner, no more slouching, back sleeping or any other comfortable position.  So far I'm on day two of sitting and standing like I'm nailed to a board and its the farthest thing from being fun.  I have also been encouraged to start stretching and arching my back like a cat. We shall see on monday if this actually works. 

For humor here is another awesome birth conversation had between B and I. 

Me- this baby really needs to turn, Its not in my plan to have a 30 hour labor

B- what do you even do for 30 hours?

Me- Labor? have contractions? Idk, but from what people say its hard and long

B- oh, thats like more than a day, how is that even possible? What if I want a break?

Me- you don't get one, rest now!

Too Many Photos Thursday

Bammo 34 weeks!

Here are catch up photos from the last few weeks and some from the baby shower last week.

Downtown Disney

Dancing a few months ago

Downtown Disney

More leggos

Leggo Dogs 

Snow white

Woody and Buzz

Fossil Encounter

Fossil Encounter

Nursery Windows

Close up 

Mom and Dad Duck

Baby Dear

Bass night light

Books and rocker pillow from Grammie

More goods from Grammie

Cow Humidifier 

Blankie and swaddle me's

Learning Puppy and First fishing hat/shirt

Hunting gear

Best onesie ever

Handmade by Aunt Christina 

More clothes

Clothes

Sheets

Mattress cover

Blankie, sheets, receiving blankets

Handmade Taggie blanket

Moby Wrap Carrier 

Shopping Cart cover

Features!

Bedding set 

Bedding set 

Bibs and diapers

Handmade burp cloths

Cloth diapers

Bowls, spoons, and nose sucker

Bath stuff 

Baby's first activity mat

Bath stuff, wipes 

Paci clips, bottle and paci's 

Sunshade and baby Einstein cd, stroller sticker

toys

Bath stuff 

BirthClass #2

We ventured into labor land last night.  Two hours of no stop labor coping, labor support, and making "change".  It was an experience. Since this is my blog I will share our experience the way it happened, not the way movies show it.  Judge if you choose, this my reality!

In previous posts I have mentioned that B and I have an unconventional way of dealing with serious situations, emotions, and over all being mushy gushy.  Sarcasm and verbal jabs are more likely to be heard than encouragement. Even though I bitch about it on occasion and still like the mushy stuff I think I would laugh and feel embarrassed if B suddenly became verbally supportive.

With that being said, coping through early labor was a huge topic yesterday.  The instructor kept going on about the support person and how important it is be calm, reassuring and assist the laboring mom however is needed. She also warned us that in labor smells, sounds, and annoyances become heightened.

Conversation Between B and I. 
B-so no picking my toes, fingers, no breathing on you, no throat clearing
Me- basically you shouldn't be the support person, there are a lot of don'ts already


Later in the class the instructor was talking about how during transition the "support" person should not ever leave the mothers side.  Not to pee, eat, sleep, drink ect.

Conversation #2 
B- so if I'm hungry who's going to make my food
me- probably not me, I doubt I will be getting out of the tub to fix you a frigging sandwich


Apparently visualizing labor and birth can make a huge impact on labor progress. We got homework to practice visualizing and relaxing for in-between contractions. Rewards after contractions such as touch, affection or praise can really boost the laboring moms energy and relaxation.

Conversation #3
B- do you want a cookie after each contraction
me- no, do you want me to smack you?
B- How about conversations hearts, you love those
me- still no, how about no food, no touching and you keep stupid comments to yourself, that should work great




Conversation #4 
B- how are you going to relax
me- I will figure it out
B- do you know how?
me- obviously not, I'm not a relaxed person, not even a little bit
B- you should really start thinking about relaxing


Fast forward to evening

B shouting from the bathroom. " I'm going to visualize, relax and get this process moving"
Seriously he is comparing having a baby to taking a shit. In his expert opinion they are practically the same. Good to know it works people.  That is the way we do it around here.  Make light of every situation and go with the flow.  On the upside I know he listened in class, I got to hear the whole demonstration again......

School Is In

Last night started the 1st of 6 weekly birth classes.  Unlike the waterbirth class this was actually informative and highly entertaining.

These classes always start the same. Everyone introducing ourselves and saying why we choose the birth center, how many kids we have blah blah blah.  B and I have a rather boring story and are usually chosen first to share no matter where we end up sitting.

We actually learned more than I expected.  B was actually involved in class- big shocker from our last one.

I have lots on the agenda today. Chiropractor appointment- this baby has one more week to move into permanent head down position.
Baby check up- this ought to be fun considering I haven't weighed myself in 3 weeks.
Haircut- time to get my mommy do done.  These poor locks have been over due for a cut an color.

I could squeal in excitement over my mom coming and the baby shower this weekend.

Weekly Catch up

I can't believe its been another week.  After not blogging for a week its time to update everyone on the weekly happenings. 

The in-laws arrived safely. 

C and I went antique shopping and scored some awesome finds. 

We have had two get togethers with extending family. (awesome food!)

B and I had a double date with the in-laws to the movies.

A serious game of monopoly unfolded saturday night.  The one who never wants to play always wins. 

Sunday brought on a serious case of swelling, it has yet to leave despite using all the "tricks". 

This week there is lots going on as well. 

Mom comes to town. 

Friends fly in for the baby shower. 

More birth class this week. 

Baby Shower. 

Finishing the nursery. 

Catching up on sleep. 

I have tons of pictures to post, I will get to them I promise.  As for my 32 week picture, I look the same as last week just more swollen.  

Crunch Time

The B and D Inn is opening for business, that means I'm busy.  Unfortunately my lazy mornings of drinking coffee and looking at dust bunnies are over.

Today I have pillows to fluff, garbage cans to empty, and pantries to stock full of food.

Lupita is back full force.  Since the dishwasher went poof all dishes must be washed by hand.  The vacuum is also acting up, lucky me.

Lucky for the guests I have had two generations of pro hostess teachings to make this run smoothly.

I would love to stay and chat but I have two hundred things on my "list" today.